Lessons in the Waiting

I'm not very good at waiting. It's a real problem. I think I was born impatient. I don't even like waiting in line for longer than five minutes! And, if you've read my last two blog posts, then you've probably caught on that I've been in a season of waiting for a long time. Longer than I anticipated...or have wanted. But through this season, God has definitely grown & challenged me & I thought I'd share a little...

In Isaiah 54:5, it says, "For your Maker is your husband — the LORD Almighty is his name." This verse used to confuse me. I just didn't understand how God, my Father, could also be God, my husband. Not only that, but I would get frustrated because I wanted an earthly husband, someone tangible. But, over time, I've realized that if God is described as my husband in His word, then it must be because He is the only One who can be everything I need at every moment of my life. No one else can be that for me. Not even the man that God has intended for me. It's taken a long time to grasp this and I know I haven't even scratched the depth of His love toward me, but I get that He is the perfect provider, comforter, and friend. It doesn't make my longing for a guy any less real, but it has made me realize that my security has to be totally in the Lord. And, that the two can coexist. God is faithful to give me simple reminders of that.

Last week, a co-worker pulled me aside & asked if she could pray for me. I honestly had no idea what it was about, but I never turn down prayer, so of course I agreed! She told me that she knew I desired to be a wife and that she felt led to pray for my husband. Totally unexpected, but God knew I needed a little affirmation that day. She prayed some very spirit-filled prayers & it was such a blessing! It reminded me that sometimes you just have to keep asking. That's hard for me at times. I think, God must get tired of me asking every day for this! Yet, somehow, He's more patient than I am. And, I'm grateful.

Though this season has been a painful one, I can honestly say I'm more ready for marriage having gone through it. Besides knowing that God is my only security and that He still encourages me in the waiting, here's what else I know (and am still finding out)...

1) I'm not in control and can't make it happen...as hard as I want to, I just can't.
2) I don't want to make apologies that I'm picky. Everyone has preferences and I shouldn't feel bad about mine.
3) I might not get everything I'm asking for in a man, but I'm still going to ask...:)
4) I'm willing to be set up, but I'll use my own judgment on who I'm willing to be set up with.
5) That nothing is wrong with me because I'm still not married (although I still have moments with this).
6) That God's love is constant and not determined by my circumstances.
7) I have a lot to offer someone and am, myself, worthy of a man's love.
8) That God has had my husband picked out for me since before I was born.
9) That I might not meet my husband at church...or Starbucks (contrary to what some might think). :)
10) No matter what people's opinions are, God sees my heart.
11) Not everyone understands or wants to hear about my journey. Sometimes, you just have to take it to God.
12) That I am thankful for the friends God has put in my life that do understand.
13) To obey God in the now so He can trust me with the "later."

If you're in a waiting season, be encouraged. It won't last forever. It's just that...a season. And seasons, fortunately, change. I, for one, am looking forward to that.